A Little Haitian Wisdom

After spending a significant amount of time in rural Northwest Haiti, I have acquired some wisdom I think is necessary to share with the world. So here, in no particular order...
the things I have learned in Haiti:

1) It's really ok to pick your nose in public.

2) Donkeys are pretty much the coolest animals on the planet, however the noise that comes out of them is not.
3) Roosters do NOT only crow in the morning.

4) A rooster or a goat that makes noise outside your window can actually turn a relatively calm person into a raging murderer who likes to throw rocks.

5) If you want some new shoes, just ask the white person visiting your country.

6) The louder you sing, the more beautiful it sounds.

7) You really can do ANYTHING with only a machete.

8) If you see little sparkles in the grass at night that look like dew droplets, don't be fooled, it's not dew, it's just the eyes of the hundreds of banana spiders looking back at you.

9) It is NOT possible to live life without a headlight.

10) Clorox is almost as handy as a headlight.

11) Hot water, internet, and washing machines are really more valuable than you think.

12) It is possible to rate how difficult or tiring a day is by how many cold cokes you need to drink by the end.

13) Haitian coke in a glass bottle is better than most everything in the world.

14) If a Haitian says rain is coming, RAIN IS COMING, go take cover somewhere.
15) Rain means everything stops, no school, no work. It is perfectly acceptable to lay in your bed all day.

16) If you take a knife away from a Dutch person, they will most likely starve to death.

17) Pepto Bismol is actually my favorite candy.

18) All of life's most difficult questions can be answered with "si Bondye vle (if God wants)" or "Bondye konnen (God knows)".

19) If your commute doesn't include a two hour donkey ride or a four hour barefooted walk in the mud, then you have no rights to complain.

20) Yawning does not mean you're tired. It means you're hungry!

21) If you feel the ground shake and you are inside, don’t think, just run! (I have acquired this instinct, even in my sleep … Sara has not)

22) Bed nets are not really for mosquitoes, they are to keep geckos, spiders, and scorpions from jumping in your bed.

23) If you get stung by a sea anemone in the ocean, just ask your friend to pee on your wound.

24) The capacity of a small Toyota truck is actually 26 people, 4 goats, and 27 chickens.

and last but not least...

25) If 911 doesn't respond, just get thirty of your neighbors and make them carry your bed to the hospital. Sprinting, singing, and an adequate ingestion of rum is required.

Fevers, Apples, and...Home

Home now…not quite sure what to think of all this but the hot showers, apples, Starbucks, and clean feeling are just pretty sweet. Seeing my beloved peeps is pretty awesome too. So far most of my activities have included moping around the house as I was sick last week. I spent the week before that in Kansas City attending a class for international public health. It was a good way to reenter this American world by putting the focus back onto international health and being with other people interested in health issues in the third world. It was all awesome (including doing our first load of laundry in the washing machine, the Kansas City BBQ, and the carton of ice cream we hid in our mini freezer all week!), except for the fact that I was starting to feel pretty sick; fevers, body aches, fatigue. I don't think it was exhaustion from four months of steady work...I think it WAS a bizarre tropical disease. A few nights I woke up drenched with sweat. I was like, oh no... I DO have TB!!! (This is my secret fear most of the time in Haiti, but it's actually not so secret because in reality I’m just a very vocal hypochondriac). By the time I landed in Seattle, I was still having body aches and just so so tired. Then the next day my whole body broke out in a red blotchy rash! I called Sara up (a little freaked) and she said she had the same thing!! How crazy is that? Anyway, although we don’t have an official diagnosis, we settled on the fact that we probably had a little dose of Dengue Fever. Just a little Haiti I brought home in my pocket.

But now I'm feeling better. Just bored some days, just so tired other days, and other days enjoying sitting in my house in this Northwest when the sun decides to make a rare appearance and makes us all believe that yes, maybe summer is really coming. But I've had summer for four months…um extreme summer, so hanging out in pants and hooded sweatshirts isn't all that bad. At least my extremities haven't gone numb yet....

As far as news from Passe Catabois, I haven’t heard much yet, but know that Dr. Michael and Esther were able to take a small vacation with their family in the Caribbean for a few weeks. Dustin and Annelies (and Rob of course) are still holding down the fort (their blog is www.haititrip.org if you want to keep up with them). And that perhaps Anne-Marie is on her way back to Haiti soon. I am missing them all as well as my Haitian friends, as the relationships we have there are the most golden things about being in Haiti.

Moun Yo!

Thursday June 3, 2010

Another one for the books. Today was our chosen rendez-vous date to take another carload of patients to the hospital in LaPointe (about an hour and a half away); most everyone for the HIV program they run there. I was nervous right off the get-go just as there were a carload of patients waiting on our direction with a long list of details to get done, in a land that if something can go wrong...it will go wrong. I knew it would be nothing but chaotic trying to maneuver the Haitian medical system (which, yes, it did not disappoint).

Seven am, we departed with four new HIV patients, three who had already been intiated in the program (all family in tow as well) and another lady with ascites of some unknown origen who we wanted to get some lab work done. So off we go, all surprisingly calm and quiet in the car until we arrive at Twa Rivye (the huge river we have to cross to get into Port de Paix). It was so high, I was starting to sweat as it was looking pretty impossible to cross. Dustin (our chauffer) waited and watched for a while - the only car we saw cross was a tap tap which was already broke down in the middle of the river - muddy water up to it's belly and all the ladies with skirts hiked up, trying to push it to the other side. After some time, and with the urging from the Haitians "wi! nou ka janbe dlo a!" and with a personal guide clinging to the side of our car, we pushed through and arrived out on the other side just fine. The water was just below the hood. Yes...our car has a snorkel.

We continued on. First, stop at the hospital in Port de Paix, to get a letter of transfer for one our our patients who had had anything but a nice experience there and we wished to restart her at LaPointe. Not surprisingly, hospital closed...Fet Dieu...thank you Haiti for yet another holiday to not be at work. Frustrating to say the least as we didn't know if we would be able to get meds for Madam Clair (yet again) at LaPointe without this letter.

Finally, we arrive into the chaos at LaPointe. And...no HIV doctor today. Apparently he left to study for something like four years. Sigh...this day was not starting out too well. We stood there in the crowd for a while trying to make order out of the mess, but it wasn't coming easily. There were still nurses working so it appeared we would be able to still do consultations. And, everything came bit by bit and after a lot of confusion and flusteration, a lot of wild goose chases (go to door number 9, now knock on door number 14, after that get your meds at door number 4, etc. etc. etc.), and some help by a very gracious Haitian nurse, we got most everything on our list done, including everything for Madam Clair. A miracle in my mind after seeing how our day started. Consultations, labs...done; meds....given. All we suspected confirmed HIV postiive, even the thirteen month old we suspected whose mom is also positive. And we only had one minor freak out when one of the ladies denied it all in the consulation with the nurse. "I don't have HIV! I will not take those meds!" This even though we had told her, her positive result at our clinic several weeks ago. Apparently it sounds different coming out of a Haitian mouth.

But it got done and the best end of the day was when we snuck over to the House of Hope to check on Gina, the toddler with Tb we dropped off about three weeks ago. We almost didn't recognize her; she was a plump little girl instead of the stick skinny baby we dropped off. She is doing so well; laughing, playing, eating, and even bossing other kids around.

We sludged and slid all over the road back home through the fresh mud (after making the most of our snorkel again), relieved and talking a lot about the nice cold cokes waiting for us at home.